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Hi Julie,

Great choice of themes for your blog.

The theme of your story has potential. Fantasy writing has a good following of readers.

Before commenting, I am curious as to what kind of feedback are you looking for. There is a lot of help to be gained from the comments of others but remember that this is your story. Let the ideas inspire you but always write for yourself.

Namaste

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Thank you. The feedback i am looking for includes:

~Constructive Critisism

~Help Editing

~possible plot points i have not thought of yet for consideration.

~info about getting published

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Dale Rogers said...

Hello, I also am a new blogger. I would love to give you feed back in response you give me feedback. I feel we are both in the same boat, lots to write but need constuctive feedback. On my blog I post sample writings and infor about writing, its a journal of a sort, so stop by.

Dale Rogers said...

Also this is a good story line. I like the ideas bubbling around in your head. Now when I was reading this I was wanting to know what was going on in the queens personal thoughts. Maybe you could give us a scene where we enter her thoughts and see her feelings. I wonder where she is at when she recieves the letter and what is she doing at the time, stuff like that. You could write in first person for her. And yes remember this is your story, above all let your ideas be number one. Happy Blogging

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Thanks, i have viewed your page today and think that your little dictionary is really cute!

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CathM said...

This is an interesting start... I look forward to seeing where you take this story! I agree with Dale – some build up/background info to the point of the letter might be something you could explore.

A couple of typo/grammar points:-
Should read ‘a’ where you write: “It was I mildly chilly day.”

Should read ‘Vagarns’ where you write: “The forest had a large mountain range called the Vagarn’s.” – unless you are saying that ‘Vargarn’s’ is the name i.e. how it would be written on a sign.

Should read ‘Genoar’s son’ where you write: “Oh she would have her revenge of him; she shall order Deloi to capture Anner, Genoars son.”

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Thank you so much for your help editing. The background of the prologue will be introduced later in the book, it is going to be in chapters 10-13.

Hope to hear from you all again, but for the moment I have to go, have a good "Presidents Day!"

Comments

Sherry Dale Rogers said…
Just wanted to say I like your theme, it fits the story... I look forward to reading.
February 16, 2009 at 3:40 PM
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